Your wedding day is drawing near and you are running through your trusty checklists and crossing all of your T’s and dotting all of your I’s. You remembered to seat great Aunt Mel next to Cousin Bruce at table 4 because they are a riot when they get together, but you have yet to […]
Your wedding day is drawing near and you are running through your trusty checklists and crossing all of your T’s and dotting all of your I’s. You remembered to seat great Aunt Mel next to Cousin Bruce at table 4 because they are a riot when they get together, but you have yet to finalize things with your officiant! YIKES! Now the natural thing to do would be to panic, but there is no need for that my lovely, your Fairy Love Mother’s at Love Deluxe came up with a short list of details that you should discuss with your officiant (deep exhale)! We got you. The average wedding ceremony is less than 25 minutes in length from start to finish, the officiant plays a HUGE part in the success of this part of your special day so keep reading on to gather some useful points to make sure you go over with the person signing off on your marriage certificate.
When you meet with your officiant of choice be ready to chat about the following:
- Their Honoraria/Fee: The average officiant presiding over a wedding charges a fee ranging anywhere from $250-$1000. This may include their travel and accommodations (especially if they are traveling out of state or out of the country to marry you). So be sure to ask them upfront what their fee is and place that in your handy dandy budget section of your wedding binder.
- Confirm the Date & Time: Sounds like a no brainer right? Not! Remember, wedding officiants are busy professionals too. Be sure that your officiant has the correct day and time on his or her calendar in reference to your rehearsal and ceremony.
- Location: Be sure to communicate to your officiant where your wedding ceremony will take place. There is nothing worse than a lost or late officiant. Talk about a wedding planner’s worst nightmare. The three people that must be there to get this party started are you, the groom and your officiant!
- Attire: Please indicate to your officiant what you would like for them to wear at your wedding. If you are having a vintage barn yard wedding do you want your officiant to show up in a floor length clergy robe or would you prefer they adorn a pair of nice slacks and a collar clergy shirt? After all, they will be captured in the majority of your ceremony photos!
- Communicate Your Plan B: In the unfortunate circumstance that your ceremony has to be relocated, tell your officiant where and how plan B will take place. For example, if the heavens open up and there is a torrential downpour 30 minutes before your outdoor ceremony, where do you want him or her to go? Additionally, your officiant will communicate to your audience where to relocate to as well. So make sure they know all the details.
- Timing: Describe to your officiant how you and your fiancé imagine the ceremony going. Do you wish for them to follow the clergy marriage ceremony book verbatim or would you like for them to interject their own words into the ceremony? Are you cool with him or her pausing the ceremony formalities to preach for a few moments on what real love is or give you both words of encouragement or affirmation? Whether you answer yes or no to these questions, you must give your officiant a time limit. Some people stick to the script while others can get lost in the moment and prolong the ceremony.
- Discuss The Flow & Activities of Your Ceremony: Are you planning to do a rose ceremony for your mother and mother in law, breaking a glass bottle, lighting a unity candle or jumping a broom? All of your desired activities need to be discussed and outlined with your officiant. If you are working with a planner or day of coordinator they will most likely already know these details, but your officiant must be well versed in them as well.
- Will they Party the Night Away? Is your officiant invited to your reception? If so, remember to add them to your guest list and have a plate and a seat for them as well. If not, communicate this to them up front so that they do not unexpectedly show up at your reception. We would hate for them to have to sit at the kids table or dine with the event staff.
- Rehearsal & Rehearsal Dinner: Indicate to your officiant the time and location of your rehearsal and rehearsal dinner (if they are invited to that part as well). Make sure you express to them your desires for how the rehearsal should be run. Will your onsite coordinator be running the rehearsal or will your officiant be running the rehearsal. Who will work through the logistics of the bridal party line up processional and recessional? Clarify this upfront so that there is no confusion once it’s go time and you can get in and get out in a timely manner.
- The Tiny Details: Give your officiant the contact information to your day of coordinator or wedding planner. Your coordinator will more than likely reach out to them, but it’s your responsibility to make sure that your officiant can communicate with your wedding planning and execution team if necessary.
See that wasn’t so bad now was it? Hey, this is why we are here! For more insightful tips, tricks and forget-me-not notes join our mailing list to be the first to know about our latest blog posts and upcoming events. For more information, tips and advice visit our amazing AEMA Love Deluxe Wedding Blog Here.
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